Umbrella RantI was listening to some music today and an old familiar song came up on the randomized playlist. It was a song I haven't listened to in a while, for no reason other than it hasn't been on my mind. It was a song I liked very much just a little while ago. It was Rhianna's hit song, "Umbrella."
When the song first came out, it was overhyped and overplayed, so I automatically didn't like it. That's just how my brain assumes things; If Everyone is doing it, then it must be wrong. My prejudice, I know. Anyway, after the initial "Umbrella" frenzy died down, I gave the song a new listening-to. First of all, it's got a great tune. It just ... sounds nice. Not to mention Rhianna has a great voice. But I am the sort of person who generally pays more attention to the lyrics than to the music. So, let's talk about the lyrics.
It is actually a really sweet song, lyrics-wise.
WNTW Power RangersWe open on a flashing montage of humourously parodied street signs. Our heroes saunter down the way, running into citizen after unfashionable citizen, and greeting them the only way they knew how. Through the magic of sarcasm and incredible taste in clothing, they improved the laymen's lives, inexplicably transforming them from normal, everyday people to normal, everyday fashionistas. The music ended, and the heroes took their place - centre stage, naturally.
One was tall and dark haired. Her impeckably done makeup accentuated her inarguable natural beauty, while her outfit - which was just to die for, by the way - displayed her perfect slender figure in the most artistic of ways. The other, taller and dreamier, was no less of a winning example of fashion at its best. His clothing maintained the delicate balance between beauty and masculinity. He looked sleek and modern, with all the appeal of a hot-off-the-as
True Vampires pt 1 of 3The bar was dark and nearly deserted. It had unusually large windows for a bar, and they were framed by thick black out curtains. Tonight, the curtains were open, and through the dingy, grimy panes, one could see a crooked branch from a tree outside. Beyond that, there was nothing save for the clouds swirling around a full moon. If the window were moved over by a few feet, to look through it would also display the bar's blinking neon sign. The sign was not supposed to blink. It just did that. And just as well, because it was great for getting the attention of passerby. After all, who could resist a tantalizing name like "Night Life."
Of course, this poses the question of why the bar was almost empty. Let's just say, it is very rare for this particular bar to get any repeat visitors. The dusty interior quickly turned most folks away. This was not the sort of place whe
Attack of the Ninja BunniesThe world was now at the mercy of the notorious ninja bunnies. What had started innocently enough as a series of experiments in genetic mutation and Japanese pop culture was fast becoming a danger that threatened to take down modern society. I, for one, am thrilled.
I mean, really, does anybody actually like modern society? It's just one big rat race with a side of popularity contest and a generous dash of pollution for good measure. I say, welcome, ninja bunny apocalypse. Still... Still, it is always wise to have a back up plan.
That is why we at Kaiju Tech Labs designed the ultimate battle machine in ninja bunny warfare. Let's see those cotton-tailed, carrot munching, shuriken throwing little buggers hop within a mile of this city. They've got no chance so long as we have Super Ultra Hyper Mega Tech Giant Flying Octopus (TM) on our side. Boo yeah!
But, alas and alack, Super Ultra Hyper
Horoscopes for KaijuAries
Today brings you good fortune in the form of a large squirming offering. Your chemistry with the frenzied sacrifice may fall flat, but rest assured, she will be a tasty snack. Your lucky symbol for the day is the flaming octogon.
You will soon meet a mysterious stranger bearing gifts and a harpoon. Accept the gifts. Leave the harpoon.
Today brings you conflict, although nothing for you to ruffle your massive feathers over. A tentacled competitor may attempt to infringe on your turf. Be prepared to defend it.
Spitting sulphuric acid may be fun, but its effects can cause long-term damage to your health. Remember, Cancer Kaiju, everything in moderation. Your lucky symbol for the day is a banner of random japanese katakana.
The humans in your near future have been preparing for your arrival by treating their skin with chemicals that could be toxic to you.
Loki sat by the window in Stark Towers reading one of the many books he had forced Tony to buy for him. He let out a sigh of content at the silence since all the Avengers seemed to be out of the tower. Or so he thought.
"GODDAMIT HAND IT OVER YOU SNOWMAN!" You yelled death glaring the man opposite you who gladly returned the glare.
"NO YOU ARE NOT TO BE TRUSTED ESPECIALLY WITH THIS!" Bucky yelled back holding Loki's scepter in his non-metal hand.
"I JUST WANNA BORROW IT I'M NOT GOING TO TURN CLINT EVIL DAMIT!" You replied. Loki groaned in annoyance and bookmarked his page before going to investigate. You paused when you heard Loki's footsteps not realizing the god himself was in the tower.
"Someone broke into the tower" You whispered to Bucky who paused to listen.
"It's probably Fury" Bucky replied.
"If it isn't though..." You trailed off.
"Fine go ahead" Bucky rolled his eyes stepping away from you. You went over to where the footsteps were coming from and waited for him to walk
Spider (Sebastian RocheXReader)
You sat on a stage in an auditorium beside Sebastian, Mark Sheppard and Misha answering fans questions. So far it was all going well and you were in the middle of answering a question not noticing a certain Moose sneak up behind you with something in his hand.
"Best fail on set? Hmm I dunno" You hummed leaning back in your chair.
"You walked into a wall a few times during our scene I dont know if that counts as fail" Mark said glancing at you or more specifically the man behind you.
"Oh! How about when you saw that spider on your chair and you jumped on Mark Pellegrino so he was holding you bridal style" Misha snapped his fingers and grinned.
"I did not jump on Mark because of that.....We were practicing for something" You defended.
"So you didn't jump because of the spider?" Mark cocked an eyebrow at you.
"Nope" You shook your head.
"Ok" Sebastian smirked while grabbing another bottle of water from the stand. You narrowed your eyes at the French man only to freeze when you saw somethi
BEN x MAJORA'S MASK MOON CRACK SHIPPING THING
Night of the 420th Day
69 Hours Remain
(oh aren't you funny)
It was night, and the moon was about to crash for like the millionth time because Link keeps dicking with the time and wanting to score with ugly chicks over and over, while everyone else is just like "oH NUUUUUU THE MOON BRO"
Twas the perfect night for BEN to confess his love to that sexy ass moon. Just thinking about those hella scary eyes and that giant ass mouth made BEN's vagina penis harden like the Stone Tower Temple. (ooooh see what I did there)
He walked up the steps of the Clock Tower and gazed upon the moon, which was eerily creeping closer to Termina.
All it took was one look and then BEN said "Fuck me."
The moon's orangey-yellow eyes got brighter. "I...I shall consume. Consume...consume everything."
"Dude I would like, love for you to consume my ass right now. Like dude, you should totally open your mouth and let me stick my dick in it or you can get smaller and I can shove y
Snake (Richard Speight JrXReader)
It was all planned perfectly. Down to the last detail. You were backstage of the panel where Richard and Matt we're answering questions about anything the fans asked. Around your neck was your pet Python Rick (cause Rick). He had been used in one of the episodes and you knew Richard hated snakes so you planned to spook him like a Moose in the headlights. Of course Richard wasn't the only one with a fear of snakes at the convention. Forgetting you were supposed to be doing a panel with Rob you never noticed him walk backstage until he let out a girly shriek causing everyone in the audience, Richard and Matt to go silent.
"(Y/N) WHAT THE HELL DHUFHW" Rob started yelling until you clamped your hand firmly over his mouth causing him to shriek repeatedly at the closeness of Rick.
"Shh! You'll ruin it!" You hissed. Rob just continued his muffled yells until you firmly duct-taped his mouth shut. Once Rob was silent you sighed in relief hearing Matt and Richard shrugged it off as nothing and h
Clothes Off (Link NealXReader)
You stood outside the changing area with a bunch of random clothes in your hands waiting for Link to say what he needed next. Humming to yourself you heard the lock on the door click open before Link stuck his head out of the room.
"Whats the smallest shirt there?" He asked.
"Umm this one" You replied holding up a pink crop top. Link looked at it for a moment before he shrugged and took it from your hand to put it on.
"What'd you think?" Link asked opening the door wider to show you the first layer of shirts and pants he put on. You bit your bottom lip to keep from laughing and nodded. He was wearing the pink crop top and a tight pair of white pants that stopped half way down his calf.
"Looks good Link" You managed to get out.
"Oh hand me the see through one!" Link said pointing to it. You passed him the shirt and noticed a baggy pair of pink pants on the floor.
"Where did you even get those?" You asked pointing to them.
"I just found them in a thrift shop" Link replied gra
Spider (Link NealXReader)
It was a quiet day to say the least. Well it started out a quiet day. Link had the day off from shooting Good Mythical Morning so he choose to spend his day with you. Currently you were in the living room reading Stephan Kings 'IT' while Link was upstairs in the shower. You knew the moment of silence wouldn't last when you heard a shriek from upstairs causing you to pause your reading.
"(Y/n)! Come here! Help! Please! Now!" Link called quickly wrapping a towel around his waist.
"If you got your hair stuck in the shower curtain I'm not helping!" You yelled back.
"What?! No I didn't get my hair stuck in the shower curtain! Just get up here! And bring a large book!" Link replied not taking his eyes off the shower. You groaned and bookmarked your page before going upstairs to the bathroom only to find it was locked.
"Unlock the door idiot. Why did you lock it anyway? It's not like someone's going to break in just to see you shower" You said knocking on the door. Link reached over and opene